This is another move adaptation of a classic Chinese literature - this time one of two most well known erotic literature in Chinese history.
Written in 1657, the Chinese name 肉蒲團 translates to "The Carnal Prayer Mat" is so titled because the book starts with protagonist speaking to the most esteemed Buddhist Priest of his time concerning the pursuit of happiness - the protagonist states that he would "pray" upon the carnal bodies of the worlds most beautiful woman and explore the boundaries of sexual ecstacy and singing of his own beauty and brilliance. With the priest warning him of karma as almost a prophecy - with it all ending as the priest said it would.
Well...at least that's what the book was about and I for one have actually read most of it - it was pretty heavy reading and my Classical Chinese is limited even at the best of times. The movie, premiered in mainstream movie theaters in 3D and was advertised as an arts film and created a huge stir over in the Asian Pacific when it was released. One of my co-workers had the 2D version on his computer and I was more than keen to know what all the fuss was about.
For the most part the movie was a softcore porn movie labelled as an arts film. Hell 3 of the lead actresses were premium Japanese Adult Entertainment Idols. So there were plenty of groaning, moaning and exaggerated expressions of climax...you will know what I'm talking about if you've seen Japanese AV. Best part about hiring them? They don't even really say much in Chinese in the movie either than making noises anyway. But with that being said, the acting wasn't half bad and there were plenty of comedic moments that wouldn't have been out of place in The Hangover movies.
The storyline was so drastically changed that it was hard to continue to use the original book title. For starters the protagonist in the movie wasn't a complete amoral son of a bitch - just a horny son of a bitch. He had good intentions and was tempted by the "Carnal Prayer Mat". Instead of surgically attaching a dogs penis to the protagonist they attached a donkey's, instead of just having affairs they had orgies, instead of a couple of woman the movie had a platoon. In the book he became a disciple of the Buddhist priest after his world collapsed around him, the movie ending was a bit more extreme but was somewhat of happy ending...in a rather extreme way that only a porn movie can.
The cinematography was quite good and one can see that they hired some of the best crew...though sometimes I wonder if they hired the best crew from the adult entertainment business as well. The costumes was wonderfully done and they even had time to include some Chinese martial arts elements in it to just add that extra Chinese/Hong Kong movie touch to it.
Overall I did enjoy it - though I'm not sure as a porno or as a movie. Should you watch it? If you're a guy it's not like you need much of an excuse to watch a porno. If you're a girl like my housemate who had to sit through 2 hours of this movie with me? Probably not.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
This is My Apology
I swear that Cape Town is where I obtain all my inspirations or new perspective in my life – lately every time I fly down I make a new discovery or take a small step in self realization.
Recently I have been crucifying everyone who has slighted or injured me (even if it’s only on here); their sometimes unintended injuries against me are recorded and (for good reason) punished.
Last week I concluded yet another disastrous race in attempting to woe the affections of someone whom I met recently – she choose her ex-ex-boyfriend over me is probably good judgement call – they seem better together. Only my pride was injured - but I let myself dwell on it longer than what it’s worth.
This was the backdrop to which I arrived in Cape Town, somewhat pissed off, somewhat holding a grudge against the rest of the world. I once again attempted to forget my problems in company of good friends, lots of loud music and drinking.
I called old friends and gathered to party that Saturday night; among them was one of my ex – SL. I have always been in contact with her and was surprisingly good at being friends after our brief and somewhat abrupt relationship. I was always under the impression that it was a mutual decision to breakup – one night both of us decided that it wasn’t going to work out and better to just let it go. But I was wrong.
She is a wonderful woman – so much so that I wondered why I ended things with her. Sure, I guess most people would find her “less than attractive” physically but strong, independent and full of ambition, all the attributes that I admire in a girl. I remembered why I liked her so much when I first met her, unable to remember why it didn’t work out, so I found myself drawn to this girl again.
Strangely I wasn’t the only wondering this problem, she ambushed me by suddenly announcing that timing was the reason for our demise and wished that if only we met much later. She is right, when I first met her she just finished high school, and I was in my fourth year. She was matured for her age, but in more than one sense of the world she was “wet behind the ears”.
I felt like we truly communicated for the first time, that even with our mutual attraction to each other four years ago this was the first time we truly connected. It was also for the first time that I realised just how much pain and suffering I’ve inflicted on this person with the heart of gold. How that the breakup was never mutual – merely that she sensed my growing reluctance and decided to walk away; for my benefit.
For some reason this probably hurt me more than having my affections spurred, I have been so caught up in my own self-loathing and bitterness that I have yet to look at the people around me and how much pain I’ve also in turn inflicted upon others. She is under the impression that I only saw her as a fling/hook-up – the truth is a bit more complicated and all I can say is that I was definitely undeniably so the one to blame.
I think need to admit to myself that I’m not a nice person. I should stop pretending that I’m one. It doesn’t impress people that don’t know me, and it doesn’t stop me from hurting those close to me. At least if I stop this charade some of them will stay away.
Recently I have been crucifying everyone who has slighted or injured me (even if it’s only on here); their sometimes unintended injuries against me are recorded and (for good reason) punished.
Last week I concluded yet another disastrous race in attempting to woe the affections of someone whom I met recently – she choose her ex-ex-boyfriend over me is probably good judgement call – they seem better together. Only my pride was injured - but I let myself dwell on it longer than what it’s worth.
This was the backdrop to which I arrived in Cape Town, somewhat pissed off, somewhat holding a grudge against the rest of the world. I once again attempted to forget my problems in company of good friends, lots of loud music and drinking.
I called old friends and gathered to party that Saturday night; among them was one of my ex – SL. I have always been in contact with her and was surprisingly good at being friends after our brief and somewhat abrupt relationship. I was always under the impression that it was a mutual decision to breakup – one night both of us decided that it wasn’t going to work out and better to just let it go. But I was wrong.
She is a wonderful woman – so much so that I wondered why I ended things with her. Sure, I guess most people would find her “less than attractive” physically but strong, independent and full of ambition, all the attributes that I admire in a girl. I remembered why I liked her so much when I first met her, unable to remember why it didn’t work out, so I found myself drawn to this girl again.
Strangely I wasn’t the only wondering this problem, she ambushed me by suddenly announcing that timing was the reason for our demise and wished that if only we met much later. She is right, when I first met her she just finished high school, and I was in my fourth year. She was matured for her age, but in more than one sense of the world she was “wet behind the ears”.
I felt like we truly communicated for the first time, that even with our mutual attraction to each other four years ago this was the first time we truly connected. It was also for the first time that I realised just how much pain and suffering I’ve inflicted on this person with the heart of gold. How that the breakup was never mutual – merely that she sensed my growing reluctance and decided to walk away; for my benefit.
For some reason this probably hurt me more than having my affections spurred, I have been so caught up in my own self-loathing and bitterness that I have yet to look at the people around me and how much pain I’ve also in turn inflicted upon others. She is under the impression that I only saw her as a fling/hook-up – the truth is a bit more complicated and all I can say is that I was definitely undeniably so the one to blame.
I think need to admit to myself that I’m not a nice person. I should stop pretending that I’m one. It doesn’t impress people that don’t know me, and it doesn’t stop me from hurting those close to me. At least if I stop this charade some of them will stay away.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Keeping a Lower Profile
This blog recently has become a place where I vent my emotional frustrations and often it is written at the heat of the moment and an impulsive move rather than a calm and collected presentation.
I've enjoy this outlet and it's a great way keep records of my emotions and development. But, it has been once again (rightly) pointed out to me that I've shared a bit too much information on here and so now the drive is to remove any specific names or references so that I won't land myself in hot water.
I've enjoy this outlet and it's a great way keep records of my emotions and development. But, it has been once again (rightly) pointed out to me that I've shared a bit too much information on here and so now the drive is to remove any specific names or references so that I won't land myself in hot water.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
So I'm a Threat - Thank You
I had an interesting experience a while back in Cape Town. I was having dinner with JC and her now re-united boyfriend and was placed in an unfamiliar situation - the boyfriend felt threatened by me.
Seriously, considering that I've known JC for a long time means that I knew PDA (Pubic Display of Affection) was never her thing and from recollection they were never this...energetic in front of people at even the best of times. No - the conclusion that I drew from the evening was that he felt threatened by me and felt somehow compelled to actually mark his territory - which I don't understand why. JC is very cool and pretty and all, but I think after over a decade of friendship nothing is going to happen between us. At first I thought I was imagining this animosity and so I spent most of the time trying my best to break the ice between us and be inclusive of him in our conversations. But it was later confirmed by another friend who was also in attendance at that restaurant.
Regardless - I retold this story to another friend, and he made a comment that gave me pause: "Well you do sort of have that reputation with other peoples girlfriends." At first I thought it was just a joke, then afterwards that line lingered and it hit me.
In our little group of friends, I had a crush on a good mates girlfriend. It was something that I sort of kept to myself for the duration of their relationship and a year after they broke up I finally worked up courage to ask her out. He knew about that incident. Then there was one occasion at my dinner party where one of the guests remarked on how much his current girlfriend seems to like me. It then came together in my head. I then understood why he never brought his girlfriend with him despite my numerous invitation to the both of them for meals, drinks or other social gatherings. He is genuinely scared of me. Not only that, from that comment I realised that he wasn't the only one who felt that way about me in our social circle.
Since then I have re-looked at a lot of my female friends boyfriends reactions to me and I reached the same conclusion with most of them, most of them feels uncomfortable when I'm around their girlfriends - one of them which such open hostility that I wonder why I haven't noticed till now.
Looking back there is two possible reasons for this sudden onset of hostility: 1.) My mistrust of people has grown and I have started to read peoples reactions to me even in social situations. 2.) I've only recently became a threat.
1.) would mean that experience in the "real world" corporate environment and having my heart shuttered into a million pieces has now influenced me to the point where I'm constantly vigilantly reading people 24/7. Which is a good thing, because I normally am a huge idiot in reading people in social situations.
2.) Would mean that something has changed in the last 2 years - that caused all these boyfriends to find my presence and friendship with their respective girlfriends uneasy.
The vanity in me want to believe in both of them, that I've grown most accustomed to putting my guard up with people and also that things has changed in the last 2 years that caused them to the weary.
I would like to think after these 2 years I've learnt to flatter people and engage them - that my social skills has improved dramatically and my tact is now leaps and bounds ahead of my old self. I would also like to think that after so much hard work on my physique that I've become a great deal more attractive if not bordering on good looking. The third change I suspect isn't the change in me but rather the change in other people's opinions. I have always been known to be a rich kid who will eventually have keys to the family fortune - but I guess for guys and girls alike when you're young you don't really put much weight into this - I mean we were all meant to become rock-stars and billionaires so who cares if your dad is merely "wealthy." I guess now more than ever my fathers wealth is an attractive "feature" to woman.
Regardless of the reason, because right now only thing that I care about is this: thank you for your highest compliments. Your insecurities towards me is just another testimony towards what I've done right and continue to help me build my self-esteem and also my confidence with woman. Rest assured that I will not put any "moves" on your girlfriends - really and honestly. Simply because I know that with all my female friends I have missed my chance to be more than just friends a long long time ago.
Seriously, considering that I've known JC for a long time means that I knew PDA (Pubic Display of Affection) was never her thing and from recollection they were never this...energetic in front of people at even the best of times. No - the conclusion that I drew from the evening was that he felt threatened by me and felt somehow compelled to actually mark his territory - which I don't understand why. JC is very cool and pretty and all, but I think after over a decade of friendship nothing is going to happen between us. At first I thought I was imagining this animosity and so I spent most of the time trying my best to break the ice between us and be inclusive of him in our conversations. But it was later confirmed by another friend who was also in attendance at that restaurant.
Regardless - I retold this story to another friend, and he made a comment that gave me pause: "Well you do sort of have that reputation with other peoples girlfriends." At first I thought it was just a joke, then afterwards that line lingered and it hit me.
In our little group of friends, I had a crush on a good mates girlfriend. It was something that I sort of kept to myself for the duration of their relationship and a year after they broke up I finally worked up courage to ask her out. He knew about that incident. Then there was one occasion at my dinner party where one of the guests remarked on how much his current girlfriend seems to like me. It then came together in my head. I then understood why he never brought his girlfriend with him despite my numerous invitation to the both of them for meals, drinks or other social gatherings. He is genuinely scared of me. Not only that, from that comment I realised that he wasn't the only one who felt that way about me in our social circle.
Since then I have re-looked at a lot of my female friends boyfriends reactions to me and I reached the same conclusion with most of them, most of them feels uncomfortable when I'm around their girlfriends - one of them which such open hostility that I wonder why I haven't noticed till now.
Looking back there is two possible reasons for this sudden onset of hostility: 1.) My mistrust of people has grown and I have started to read peoples reactions to me even in social situations. 2.) I've only recently became a threat.
1.) would mean that experience in the "real world" corporate environment and having my heart shuttered into a million pieces has now influenced me to the point where I'm constantly vigilantly reading people 24/7. Which is a good thing, because I normally am a huge idiot in reading people in social situations.
2.) Would mean that something has changed in the last 2 years - that caused all these boyfriends to find my presence and friendship with their respective girlfriends uneasy.
The vanity in me want to believe in both of them, that I've grown most accustomed to putting my guard up with people and also that things has changed in the last 2 years that caused them to the weary.
I would like to think after these 2 years I've learnt to flatter people and engage them - that my social skills has improved dramatically and my tact is now leaps and bounds ahead of my old self. I would also like to think that after so much hard work on my physique that I've become a great deal more attractive if not bordering on good looking. The third change I suspect isn't the change in me but rather the change in other people's opinions. I have always been known to be a rich kid who will eventually have keys to the family fortune - but I guess for guys and girls alike when you're young you don't really put much weight into this - I mean we were all meant to become rock-stars and billionaires so who cares if your dad is merely "wealthy." I guess now more than ever my fathers wealth is an attractive "feature" to woman.
Regardless of the reason, because right now only thing that I care about is this: thank you for your highest compliments. Your insecurities towards me is just another testimony towards what I've done right and continue to help me build my self-esteem and also my confidence with woman. Rest assured that I will not put any "moves" on your girlfriends - really and honestly. Simply because I know that with all my female friends I have missed my chance to be more than just friends a long long time ago.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Time to Just Give Up
Two weekends ago I went back to Cape Town for rest and fun - OK not so much rest rather than a weekend of complete debauchery. Nowadays I only return to greet old friends - otherwise I don't stay there long enough to do interesting things that make my trip worthwhile.
When friends return from China/HK/UK/US/Sweden and I would try to plan a weekend down see them and also wreck havoc while down there. Normally I don't ONLY go down because of their arrival, rather because I try to plan my trips to coincide. This particular weekend was such when JB one of my closest friends from my high school days returned to Cape Town from Oxford.
A while back she told me when she will be back and looking at my schedule (yes I have one) and thought that it was perfect because it would be the weekend after my CFA exams and can double up as my post-exams celebrations.
She has a busy schedule when she is down in Cape Town spending time with friends and family and most importantly with the boyfriend. So I tried to be understanding when she renegades me to only tea or light lunch and sometimes just cancelling it all together. Still I only held a small grudge and I sometimes more than a little that I was never invited over for meals with the family after all the years.
This time round was the final straw, I made it very clear to her the week before that I'm making this trip SPECIALLY so that I can met up with her. I was renegaded from a meal to a light lunch to tea at her place to finally being cancelled altogether. I give up.
I realised that we have grown apart through the years and it didn't occur to her how much it breaks my heart to think that she couldn't even spare me a few hours of her free time. She helped me through some of my darkest hours and so I truly thought of her as my confidant.
The suffering in the past year helped me to realise that life is too short, I don't have the time, or energy (or money for that matter) to waste on people that makes me feel like shit - I must learn to let go.
When friends return from China/HK/UK/US/Sweden and I would try to plan a weekend down see them and also wreck havoc while down there. Normally I don't ONLY go down because of their arrival, rather because I try to plan my trips to coincide. This particular weekend was such when JB one of my closest friends from my high school days returned to Cape Town from Oxford.
A while back she told me when she will be back and looking at my schedule (yes I have one) and thought that it was perfect because it would be the weekend after my CFA exams and can double up as my post-exams celebrations.
She has a busy schedule when she is down in Cape Town spending time with friends and family and most importantly with the boyfriend. So I tried to be understanding when she renegades me to only tea or light lunch and sometimes just cancelling it all together. Still I only held a small grudge and I sometimes more than a little that I was never invited over for meals with the family after all the years.
This time round was the final straw, I made it very clear to her the week before that I'm making this trip SPECIALLY so that I can met up with her. I was renegaded from a meal to a light lunch to tea at her place to finally being cancelled altogether. I give up.
I realised that we have grown apart through the years and it didn't occur to her how much it breaks my heart to think that she couldn't even spare me a few hours of her free time. She helped me through some of my darkest hours and so I truly thought of her as my confidant.
The suffering in the past year helped me to realise that life is too short, I don't have the time, or energy (or money for that matter) to waste on people that makes me feel like shit - I must learn to let go.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Sins of the Father
Towards the end of April I had dinner with my aunt (the younger sister of my father) and it was a rather strange affair considering that I haven't seen her since my grandfathers funeral four years ago.
My father and his sibling used to be very close and I always had fond memories of this woman who was warm and affectionate. Describing their relations as strained nowadays would be an under-statement - they haven't spoken for almost 4 years and if it wasn't the passing of my grandfathers I don't think they would've seen each other for a much longer time. Both embody the classic family trait of headstrong, stubborn and unforgiving, the same traits that allowed members of the extended family to flourish during the worst of times in China and now practically conquering Southern Africa.
For the most part - without taking sides the simple truth is that within the struggle for power that ensured in the DRC my dad and uncle lost whilst my aunt won. My dad is bitter that he lost and to be fair my father is acting like a kid because of it.
This meeting was long overdue, for the most part I still hold this aunt in high regard partially because I was the youngest and partially because out of the all the grandchildren I was the most loved. So sitting for breakfast at the Pivot Hotel in Monte Casino waiting for my aunt was an unusual feeling of anticipation and sadness I wondered "How did our family get to this point? That meeting a favourite aunt needed to be treaded so carefully."
Regardless, soon after her arrival the conversation went quickly and rather painfully - she appealed to me to forget whatever happened between her and her elder brother, that whatever happens between them is between them and shouldn't having any bearing on what our relationship should be like.
To me that comment can be rather disingenuous - as the main benefactor to my fathers fortunes her gain was my loss (a huge one at that) and setting the precedence that I have to be careful around this woman. I also have no doubt that my cousins will also have their guards up around me due to my father - the seeds of distrust has been sown.
No, dear Aunty - sins of the father will pass one from generation to generation. If our family were the forgiving type we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place. I will continue to remember you as that kind and generous woman that has greeted me whenever I was in Hong Kong, but things will never be the same again between us, I will always be careful around you from now on. For that I'm truly sad.
My father and his sibling used to be very close and I always had fond memories of this woman who was warm and affectionate. Describing their relations as strained nowadays would be an under-statement - they haven't spoken for almost 4 years and if it wasn't the passing of my grandfathers I don't think they would've seen each other for a much longer time. Both embody the classic family trait of headstrong, stubborn and unforgiving, the same traits that allowed members of the extended family to flourish during the worst of times in China and now practically conquering Southern Africa.
For the most part - without taking sides the simple truth is that within the struggle for power that ensured in the DRC my dad and uncle lost whilst my aunt won. My dad is bitter that he lost and to be fair my father is acting like a kid because of it.
This meeting was long overdue, for the most part I still hold this aunt in high regard partially because I was the youngest and partially because out of the all the grandchildren I was the most loved. So sitting for breakfast at the Pivot Hotel in Monte Casino waiting for my aunt was an unusual feeling of anticipation and sadness I wondered "How did our family get to this point? That meeting a favourite aunt needed to be treaded so carefully."
Regardless, soon after her arrival the conversation went quickly and rather painfully - she appealed to me to forget whatever happened between her and her elder brother, that whatever happens between them is between them and shouldn't having any bearing on what our relationship should be like.
To me that comment can be rather disingenuous - as the main benefactor to my fathers fortunes her gain was my loss (a huge one at that) and setting the precedence that I have to be careful around this woman. I also have no doubt that my cousins will also have their guards up around me due to my father - the seeds of distrust has been sown.
No, dear Aunty - sins of the father will pass one from generation to generation. If our family were the forgiving type we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place. I will continue to remember you as that kind and generous woman that has greeted me whenever I was in Hong Kong, but things will never be the same again between us, I will always be careful around you from now on. For that I'm truly sad.
Friday, June 10, 2011
CFA Level 2 Exams and Beyond
I wrote the Chartered Financial Analyst Exams last Saturday - two years after I wrote and passed Level 1 on my first attempt. It was a really strange experience and thinking back I had so much riding on that exam.
After a 6 month job search the best I could manage was a position as a Researcher in a glorified call center - doing cold calls. Little more than 2 months working I quit the job citing the slow destruction of my pride and sanity. Impulsively I convinced myself that the one way that I was going to salvage that year was to write and pass the first CFA exams. So 2 days before the final registration date I paid a hefty sum of US$1080 and started studying vigorously. The idea was to spend the next 3 months studying for the exam.
I performed very poorly at university - achieving very low marks and just managing to scrap a pass for every subject despite being one of the most engaging student in my lectures (well, the ones that I bothered going to). During that time I never doubted my abilities, merely my motivation for a degree that my parents forced upon me.
But for that exam I was completely driven - I knew that if I was to fail in this endeavour then one of two conclusions could've been draw: 1: I lack potential to succeed. 2. I lack the temperament to succeed at crucial moments. In either case the conclusion would've been that I was FAR from exceptional - a conclusion that I was MORE than willing to accept at that point in time. After spending almost 2 months being completely locked up in my house and room studying over 12 hours a day - I wrote and passed the exam comfortably achieving 75%+ for 8 out of the 9 sections. That exam partially helped me to believe in myself again - but this time round it was very different mentality that I wrote the level 2 exam.
Level 2 I registered because I felt I needed to improve my credentials and continue my growth - but realised a month later that I made the wrong decision considering that my career path has been moving further and further away from Financial Markets and Asset Management. Regardless I felt that it was great life lesson in perseverance, time management and generally life management. Since this time round I would be writing this exam while working a full time job with chaotic and volatile work hours. The studying didn't go as well as I hoped it would due to all manners of distractions - as well as having my study leave (week before the exam) cancelled in the last minute due to pressing matters. The likelihood of me passing this time round is about as good as me winning the lottery (too many questions guessed).
Comparing myself to the lost kid 2 years ago, without any idea what he wants in life, where he wants to go and who he is. I've come a long long way. Now, I KIND of know what I want in life, I have a VAGUE definition of what happiness is and a very foggy idea of how I would achieve it. If there is one thing I know about myself is that I'm a stubborn asshole that has my sight on a target I just don't let go.
This time round, I will be steadfast, I will be strong, I BELIEVE in myself and I WILL succeed in whatever life throws at me.
After a 6 month job search the best I could manage was a position as a Researcher in a glorified call center - doing cold calls. Little more than 2 months working I quit the job citing the slow destruction of my pride and sanity. Impulsively I convinced myself that the one way that I was going to salvage that year was to write and pass the first CFA exams. So 2 days before the final registration date I paid a hefty sum of US$1080 and started studying vigorously. The idea was to spend the next 3 months studying for the exam.
I performed very poorly at university - achieving very low marks and just managing to scrap a pass for every subject despite being one of the most engaging student in my lectures (well, the ones that I bothered going to). During that time I never doubted my abilities, merely my motivation for a degree that my parents forced upon me.
But for that exam I was completely driven - I knew that if I was to fail in this endeavour then one of two conclusions could've been draw: 1: I lack potential to succeed. 2. I lack the temperament to succeed at crucial moments. In either case the conclusion would've been that I was FAR from exceptional - a conclusion that I was MORE than willing to accept at that point in time. After spending almost 2 months being completely locked up in my house and room studying over 12 hours a day - I wrote and passed the exam comfortably achieving 75%+ for 8 out of the 9 sections. That exam partially helped me to believe in myself again - but this time round it was very different mentality that I wrote the level 2 exam.
Level 2 I registered because I felt I needed to improve my credentials and continue my growth - but realised a month later that I made the wrong decision considering that my career path has been moving further and further away from Financial Markets and Asset Management. Regardless I felt that it was great life lesson in perseverance, time management and generally life management. Since this time round I would be writing this exam while working a full time job with chaotic and volatile work hours. The studying didn't go as well as I hoped it would due to all manners of distractions - as well as having my study leave (week before the exam) cancelled in the last minute due to pressing matters. The likelihood of me passing this time round is about as good as me winning the lottery (too many questions guessed).
Comparing myself to the lost kid 2 years ago, without any idea what he wants in life, where he wants to go and who he is. I've come a long long way. Now, I KIND of know what I want in life, I have a VAGUE definition of what happiness is and a very foggy idea of how I would achieve it. If there is one thing I know about myself is that I'm a stubborn asshole that has my sight on a target I just don't let go.
This time round, I will be steadfast, I will be strong, I BELIEVE in myself and I WILL succeed in whatever life throws at me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)