The Path to Hell is Paved With Good Intentions

My mother was diagnosed with cancer about a year back. Mostly it was a sobber affair that feels like a oncoming collision that has been captured and replayed in slow motion frame per frame.

It was a somewhat painful experience seeing someone slowly face a doom foretold and not being able to do a thing about it. In this particular circumstance the best one could hope for is that she will pass away content with her life. Failing that being able to pass away painlessly.

It was about this time that many of our own family and good friends come forward to provide much needed emotional support, but unfortunately what came with them was the painful and irksome desire to help my mom physically. Each one of them has some kind of great medicinal cure for pain, or heard somewhere that consuming/doing/praying certain things will help her.

Most of these advices range from the homeo remedies to new age ideas to the ever popular traditional Chinese remedies. During these times I can never look at them in the eye and none of them noticed - for which I'm glad. I'm also infinitely glad that none of them noticed my clinched fists and grinding teeth.

I ask myself "Are these people serious?" The cancer has reached the terminal phase and they're trying to peddle me completely useless home remedies?" Don't get me wrong, I call these people friends any other time of the year and found their company pleasant. However all their good intentions ever achieved was to pick at an open wound on someone who has a reputation for a short fuse.

The last time was the benefits of a fasting with apple ciders. All I could do was avert my eyes keep my head down and tell them that they really should speak to my dad about this because I'm not in charge of my mom's diet or meals. The simple truth was that if he had persisted I might have physically assaulted one of them.

The truly heart breaking thing is that sometimes these talks give my mom false hope - gives her a momentary hope only to be destroyed again times over in the next examination. It was about that time that I was reminded of a proverb that is the title of this post "The path to hell is paved with good intentions"

What I Consider to Be Contradictions in International Econoimcs

Originally posted on: Monday, 17th November, 2008

As some of you might have heard, we are currently in an world economic crisis where the big and rich countries are basically drowning in debt thanks to: 1.) over consumption and 2.) minimal savings.

So where do the world economy turn to from here? Last time the Great Depression (I understand that this comparison is unfair but bare with me) was not defeated due to the New Deal of Roosevelt despite popular belief. It was due to the advent of WWII (this is my opinion and if you don't like it, suck it). But this time round we don't have a moustache wearing lunatic leading an advanced industrial nation. So as the fate's sense of irony would like it, this time round they turn to China, a self proclaimed Communist nation.

As the Economist wrote, around three or four decades ago politicians and economist proclaims that the only thing that will save China is Capitalism, today China is the only one that can save Capitalism. The big question is how? Well my beloved Economist magazine reckons that government should "encourage" it's middle class to spend a lot more money, and basically save a lot less, hell start borrowing as well. This way China will start consuming lots of goods and prop up the world economy in a time of crisis.

As I read this I wonder to myself "Am I the only one who seems a problem with this setup?" You're trying to get the one country who is actually keeping the world economy afloat with cash due to it's overwhelming civilian savings of close to 50% of income (which incidentally is the exact ratio that classic economics says you should save) to be more like the countries that started the problem in the first place?

I mean, sure maybe this time round it will help avert the crisis. But then in another 70 years time and China becomes another US that over consumes and over leverage their economy and thus starts a similar crisis. Who will save us then?

Why is it that every time that I read a magazine or opinion piece from an economist it seems to be crucifying the Chinese for saving what they earn? You would think from reading the articles that somehow that this is a conspiracy by the Chinese people to not spend money in order to frustrate the international community, hell if it didn't know better I would think that saving majority of your income away is a crime.

Olympics in the Middle Kingdom

Originally Posted: Thursday, 11th September, 2008

The last month and a bit spent in China has been rather exciting, one doesn't need to watch the games live to feel and see the euphoria of nation no matter where I go. Olympic results were continually updated and with China topping the gold medal charts the sense of patriotism reached a level that I never thought imaginable for a cynic like myself.

The utter contempt that I once felt for the national anthem and its lyrics makes me cringe and shrivel up by myself in a corner now doesn't seem that bad; I mean the opening lines "Stand up, the people who no longer want to be slaves" is actually starting to sound grandiose and dramatic. Admittedly the last line "using our bodies as shields marching into enemy fire" is something that will never sit right with me, ever.

I probably would've cried my eyes out because how much I was moved and how proud I was during the opening ceremonies if not thanks to a rather irritating commentator (Sportsports) that kept ruining the moment for me with irrelevant and often incorrect facts. Then again not surprising considering that the opening function involved over 1300 performers and costs over US$300million. This is rather incredible considering that China is rather well known for it's cheap goods and labour...well actually in this case free labour (or sunk cost labour) because vast majority of the performers were from the Peoples Liberations Army (PLA) and when they are not threatening Tibet and Taiwan or the aftermath of an Earthquake; they're used as free extras in huge budget Chinese movies such as Hero and Curse of the Golden flower. Really the Chinese are nothing if not pragmatic.

The Olympics was China's coming out party, admittedly a very belated one and their (our?) final round defeat to Sydney to host the 2000 Olympics were recalled with much bitterness; but that is very much behind them (us?) now that the 2008 Olympics are over with enough splendour to match its anticipation. In fact I doubt that another country will ever put this much effort, manpower, political and economic might into the organisation of the Olympic games. With a price tag of over US$42billion it is easily the most expensive Olympic games ever held, over 3 times the amount spent on Athens. Security measures during the games (for whatever reasons) were almost unprecedented, with anti-aircraft missiles integrated into the "Bird's Nest" and some sources claims that over 400 000 soldiers were on standby within 200km's radius of the countries' capital, really one has to wonder that kind of scenario were being considered by the PLA? A sudden invasion of China by another country?

All in all, despite protests, politics and a dodgie start to the Olympics I believe that future historians will probably look back to these games and mark it as an important point in history. Whether it be the marker for the rise of a dictatorial states whose policies cause more bloodshed than the Americans. Or the rise of a truly splendid culture that has once again reintegrated itself into the global village.

Whatever happens now and whatever has happened before for the first time in my life, during and after these games I'm truly and utterly proud to be called Chinese. Truly proud and not just some strange loyalty towards your country of birth, and a somewhat fleeting sense of patriotism. Something for those of you who knows about my family history will understand.

Arriving at a Dream

Originally posted: Saturday 30th September 2006:

Most of my life can be conviniently divided up in segments, JHB, Cape Town, high school and university. The most clear cut of these segments of my life was when I left China at the age of 6 to visit for the first time what I then considered to be a magical city: Hong Kong.

Hong Kong had almost a mythical status in the hearts and minds of many Chinese living in the mainland. You see, two decades ago China was not a manufacturing giant and an emerging superpower. At this point in time it was still a typical communist state: poor, corrupt and with a generally miserable population.

The city was awe-inspiring. For a 6 year old who until now has been living in the country side, seeing sky-scrappers for the first time had an almost spiritual feel to it. This was the place where millions of Mainlanders has tried to reach, legal or otherwise. Many would have paid richly and given much to be in our shoes. We were the envy of thousands and millions. In fact, Hong Kong to many is what US represents to most of the the third world, and so for all intents and purposes our family has achieved the "Hong Kong Dream."

However, mainlanders to the general Hong Kong population is much like the current Turks in Germany. We were the bottom of the social hierarchy, somehow less than them. The media and television portrayed us as criminals and a distasteful part of their society. I was too naive to realise that these people don't consider us to be their equal. More recently a Hong Kong born girl told me that she has nothing against Mainlanders; it's just that"...the whores kept on stealing Hong Kong woman's husbands and have no shame."

What makes this particular form of racism/discrimination interesting is because vast majority of the (then) 6million people in Hong Kong are either refugees or descents of refugees that fled China during and after the civil war. The separation of Hong Kong from mainland China was less than a hundred years. Our language and culture was undistinguishable and this discrimination was brought out completely by class and shame.

The same shame that drove me to only speak the "Cantonese" dialect and not my own home dialect or the universal Mandarin. The same shame that made my parents tell people in South Africa that I'm from Hong Kong and not China because we were ashamed. You see, during the time that Hong Kong was becoming an economical powerhouse of Asia, China continued on its decline and economical collapse. They were embarrassed by their homeland and started to believe that they weren't "Chinese" but rather something else, something better. I spent a lot of time pretending that I don't speak Mandarin and only Cantonese (which I picked up quickly with my cousins) But that was all set to change and in came in the form of 1997.

In 1997 China regained control of Hong Kong. I guess it's because that they can no longer be in denial - they're now Chinese, by birth, culture and now by politics. Perhaps they were slowly but surely realising they need China more than China needs Hong Kong. Either way, Mandarin suddenly became the next big craze, it was now considered "educated" even "cool" to be able to speak the dialect. The irony of this hypocrisy nauseates me.

In 2003, I was impressed by a salesperson at Lacoste when she made her sales pitch starting in Mandarin, then in Cantonese and English consecutively. A big contrast to my earlier visits in 1994 when while sitting in MacDonalds one of the patrons; a middle age housewife loudly complained about the amount of "stinking" Mainlanders are in Hong Kong, more specifically she was referring to me and my sisters.

How the world has changed, nowadays people from the Mainland, especially from the big cities such as Shanghai and Beijing can hold their heads high and stare at everyone else and proudly proclaim their origins, culture and race; frowning on those who decide to emigrate. However, at the same time these mainlanders are also discriminating against their fellow countryman from less privileged backgrounds. Their contempt and racism for people of other races are as bad if not worse than those that discriminated against us decades ago.

Recently, China has been referred to by many as the "Miracle Economy" and seems to be on course to become the rival superpower to America. But with this kind of attitude and cultural arrogance, this "China Dream" will be short lived, or worse a negative influence in human development.

Kafka on the Shores

Originally posted: Wednesday, 8th August 2007

The 2nd book that I have read by Murakami Haruki. I enjoyed this particular one a lot more than The Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the end of the World. There was something special about this one, that captivates me.

The strength of Murakami's writing shines through here again and he paints a world so real and yet at the same time so foreign and beautiful. His description of scenery and emotions are heads and shoulders above many modern authors and one find themselves immersed into his world - at times my heart quickened by the phantom sound and smell that I found myself experiencing.

This book is very much like the other in that it's a metaphysical story set in the modern world and runs two paralle stories: one of a 15 year old boy running away from his fathers dark Oepidal prophecy and the other about an elderly mentally handicapped man with the strange ability to talk to cats.

The story is once again complex and keeps the reader guessing like a good detective story, the characters are magnificently rendered and likeable. The story despite its dark undertones is heart-warming and at the same time sexually charged.

This book will rank among one of the best I have read and would recommend it to anyone.

Hard Boiled Wonderland and The End of the World

Now here is a book that was recommended to me by Amilcar. It was interesting to say the least. The style of writing and narration was definitely different different from most books that I've ever read and while the story was not exactly original in any sense of the word. The book takes you for a ride.

It was very well written, not in the same way that Pride and Prejudice was. Pride was written in a beautifully archaic and flowing words while Hard Boiled was written with a a certain amount of precision - it felt smooth and polished.

The story was intriguing, kept the reader in the dark for well over half of the book and the ending wasn't much of surprise.

Not something I want to comment on yet, maybe need to reread it once in order to make a final judgement.

Update: No, this is a great book despite its craziness

Pride and Prejudice

Originally posted: Sunday, 27 May 2007

Another one of those books that I read purely because it’s an old classic that’s very well read and critically acclaimed. It is also the second book that I read because of a rather pretty girl that I’m interested in recommended it. Bad motives I understand, but I definitely prefer this one than the Harry Potter series. Fell asleep numerous times between the first book and the third.

But I truly enjoyed the book, it was pretty much the same as any other romance novel, but written in a refreshingly (for me at least) archaic language; but so elegantly written that I just fall in love with the choice of words than the actual story itself. It was also interesting to see how the English language has evolved. Words used in a different context than what we would use today. The way that words are spelled is also interesting, choose and chuse.

The book has certain magical quality that is truly intangible. The plot is the standard boy meet girl, girl shouldn’t be with boy, but passion is too strong and eventually girl gets with boy. But here is where the magic comes in, every page captivated me. The use of language was beautiful and makes me want to jump for joy and anticipation with every line.

Selfish Gene

Originally posted: 6 March 2007

Finally finished reading the last pages of the critically acclaimed and most life-changing book I have ever read...

Ok, so I have made such sweeping statements about books that I read before. But this one really takes the cake. Another recent book which really challenged my perspective was Thomas Friedman's "The Earth is Flat: Brief History of the 21st Century", but it only really changed my perspective about the near future, aka employment prospects and not in the nice way. (In fact, I felt more depressed after reading it) For me, what Richard Dawkins (incidentally the author of the Selfish Gene) made me feel better about myself; for one thing it's a good conversation starter with the biologists.

Born into a predominately secular society, where religion (or superstition) is completely removed from schools; I never really understood why the hell would people want their children to be taught nonsense about a crazy ass god, virgin births and the superiority of a certain desert race. But they did ask some fundamental questions that I never asked until my first ever bible ed class: "meaning of life", "life after death" and in this context the ultimate question: "where did we come from?"

Never taken into the Christian faith; probably due to my experiences in primary school (prep for you elitist bastards) forced to join their discussions and later, received punishment for not believing the ultimate and undying truth that is written in the bible...but that's another story.

Then what started as a stubborn rebellion against authority turned to into a crusade when I made the mistake of going to a little high school called Bishops. I was almost certain that all forms of religion was BS before I started; by the time I finished there...it was just pure agony whenever someone asks me "Have you been saved?" *INSERT HERE* The most horrible threat I have ever made and multiply that by infinity and take it to another dimension of infinity and you'll get my general drift.

But the above mentioned questions has barely been answered; theology (whether Western or Eastern) fails hopelessly to even begin to explain it. I knew that supposedly, the origin of life could be potentially explained by evolution; but had many reservations about a theory that I know so little about.

This is where the book is so liberating for me; actually reading it and with the turning of each page I felt liberated. Previously I was only certain that there probably isn't a god, at least not one that is written by the three derivatives of the Abrahamic religions; I merely disagreed with them, but never actually had an alternative that I truly belief in.

But here is the thing, almost everyone (myself included) thought that they understood Darwinism and Theory of Evolution; but are actually surprised when they are presented with the orthodox theory and it's simple mechanism.

Read the book, it's beautifully written in such a way that even an idiot like me could understand it and feel the implications of such a theory. At least, it's infinitely better written than this note. If you're agnostic, atheist, or someone who couldn't give a damn then read it. For you religious folks...well since you managed to read this far then you should also read it, it just might change you. The book has been in print for over 30years, it started out as radical science to now being fairly orthodox views (I stand to be corrected) and that shows for something.