I wrote the Chartered Financial Analyst Exams last Saturday - two years after I wrote and passed Level 1 on my first attempt. It was a really strange experience and thinking back I had so much riding on that exam.
After a 6 month job search the best I could manage was a position as a Researcher in a glorified call center - doing cold calls. Little more than 2 months working I quit the job citing the slow destruction of my pride and sanity. Impulsively I convinced myself that the one way that I was going to salvage that year was to write and pass the first CFA exams. So 2 days before the final registration date I paid a hefty sum of US$1080 and started studying vigorously. The idea was to spend the next 3 months studying for the exam.
I performed very poorly at university - achieving very low marks and just managing to scrap a pass for every subject despite being one of the most engaging student in my lectures (well, the ones that I bothered going to). During that time I never doubted my abilities, merely my motivation for a degree that my parents forced upon me.
But for that exam I was completely driven - I knew that if I was to fail in this endeavour then one of two conclusions could've been draw: 1: I lack potential to succeed. 2. I lack the temperament to succeed at crucial moments. In either case the conclusion would've been that I was FAR from exceptional - a conclusion that I was MORE than willing to accept at that point in time. After spending almost 2 months being completely locked up in my house and room studying over 12 hours a day - I wrote and passed the exam comfortably achieving 75%+ for 8 out of the 9 sections. That exam partially helped me to believe in myself again - but this time round it was very different mentality that I wrote the level 2 exam.
Level 2 I registered because I felt I needed to improve my credentials and continue my growth - but realised a month later that I made the wrong decision considering that my career path has been moving further and further away from Financial Markets and Asset Management. Regardless I felt that it was great life lesson in perseverance, time management and generally life management. Since this time round I would be writing this exam while working a full time job with chaotic and volatile work hours. The studying didn't go as well as I hoped it would due to all manners of distractions - as well as having my study leave (week before the exam) cancelled in the last minute due to pressing matters. The likelihood of me passing this time round is about as good as me winning the lottery (too many questions guessed).
Comparing myself to the lost kid 2 years ago, without any idea what he wants in life, where he wants to go and who he is. I've come a long long way. Now, I KIND of know what I want in life, I have a VAGUE definition of what happiness is and a very foggy idea of how I would achieve it. If there is one thing I know about myself is that I'm a stubborn asshole that has my sight on a target I just don't let go.
This time round, I will be steadfast, I will be strong, I BELIEVE in myself and I WILL succeed in whatever life throws at me.
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