Originally this posts title was "Seriously? How can I possibly be upset" and I realised quickly that I'm lying to myself. I know exactly why I'm so upset.
Today is my 35th birthday, while I never expected you to be spending it with me; I wished and hoped you would. At least an attempt? Lie to me, tell me all kinds of excuse why you couldn't and I will believe you - because I have fallen hopelessly in love with you.
Seeing you tonight with someone else was heartbreaking. I felt the earth gave way under me and I free fall towards the centre of the earth. All I wanted to do was find myself a hole and cry myself to sleep.
I feel like I have been doing this all wrong; all wrong.
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